Picnics, swimming and diapers :)

This has been a fun week so far. On Monday we got to go to lunch with my best friend, Lacey. I always love being with her. She makes me a better person :) And later that evening she came to the grocery store with us, which was an immense help. Afton just wanted to hold Lacey's hand! We had a blast visiting. She helps keep me sane!

On Tuesday we met up with Grandma and Carrie and one of Carrie's friends (And Liam too of course) and had a picnic and then went swimming in this adorable little paddling pool near Carrie's house. It's just perfect for the little kids.

Here is Afton at the picnic, having a blast and being her adorable self :)

While in the pool Autumn thought it was just about the best thing ever. Here she is lounging in her tube. Life is good.

We had a lot of fun playing in the water and being in the sun. My girls are definitely water babies! Just like me :) Liam loves it too. I don't understand why my sisters don't really like swimming. Thank goodness Liam will always have an Aunt and Grandma who will take him swimming! Carrie came in too but she is not a water love like the rest of us :)

Later that evening we were at my parent's place and all of the kids wanted Grandma at the same time. It was just about the cutest thing ever to see them all piled on her lap.

Afton especially adores her grandparents on both sides. The minute she isn't with one of them she is crying that she misses them. All I hear all day is "I miss Grandma so much", "I miss Nana so much" it get's a bit tiresome. Even as I type this she is in her room (supposed to be going to sleep) crying because she misses my mom. She is a sweetheart and loves with all her being.

Today is Wednesday and we were able to go to lunch with Lacey again. Afton kept saying, "I can't wait to see Lacey!" and after we left she said, "I miss my Lacey." I feel the same way! We went to Chick-Fil-A and let Afton play in the play place while we talked. I love their food. And I loved the company!

When we got home I decided to use some old receiving blankets and make Afton a few diapers for her dolls. They turned out really cute and Afton was thrilled. I absolutely love having a sewing machine. I need more projects. Too bad fabric costs money! I'd be sewing all the time if I could. I really enjoy it. I just wish I was better at it!

My girls sure keep me busy and sleep deprived! Autumn still wakes up continually through the night. I'm hoping that when we are in a new place and she is in her own room that things will get better. We get to start looking on the 9th!

Oh dear, Afton just woke up Autumn. I guess it's gonna be a long night! Haha

New beginning

So a couple of weeks ago now I went to my doctor. We talked at length and decided I am NOT bipolar. Instead he doubled my dose of Zoloft (I was on the lowest dose) and instructed that I get more sleep. Well with Autumn waking up so much still that's kind of impossible. But we're working on it. The good news is...I feel so much better!!!

I hardly feel anxious at all anymore and when I start to I can easily control it. I am not getting frustrated or ANGRY all the time anymore. I feel like myself again. Things are so much easier.

Although I still feel extremely tired all the time. My doctor had my thyroid checked which all came back normal and was going to have my hemoglobin tested for anemia but forgot so I have to go back in for a finger poke. I'm pretty sure I'm anemic and that's part of my problem.

I am so grateful for modern day medicine and help. Without it I'm pretty sure I would have ended up in an insane asylum, complete with a strait jacket! Haha.

Some things that are going on in our lives right now are as follows:

Autumn is starting to walk! She isn't fully walking yet but she is up to about 4-5 steps at a time before she crashes haha. It's so cute watching her toddle along with a big grin on her face and an expression that clearly says, "Look at me Mom!" It makes me laugh everytime. She has also learned how to sign "All Done", "More", "Milk", and shakes her head "No". She is a smartie just like her sissy!

Afton is learning so much all the time. Lately I've found that she appears to actually be reading. There are times I think she just recognizes what should be happening in a book or something but then I wonder if she is actually starting to recognize words. The other day she was with my mom and they were looking through a list of shows and Afton immediately picked out the show she wanted just by the Title. Pretty impressive. Also, the other day, my mom and I were talking about going to the Zoo but we didn't want to say it out loud in case it didn't end up working and Afton getting disappointed so we spelled it out. Z-O-O. And Afton repeated it then said, Z.... Zoo! I want to go to the Zoo! So she is definitely comprehending a lot! It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy knowing that some of the things I'm doing as a parent are helping her learn and grow :)

Here are a few pictures that make me smile :)

Afton is starting to love having Autumn around a little more, rather than just tolerate her. It's sweet seeing them together. Autumn absolutely ADORES Afton.

Tyler got me a sewing machine for our Anniversary/my Birthday. I made this dress for Afton out of some of her old shirts :)

Recently Eric took Afton on a fun day date with him. They went to Thanksgiving Point and Afton got to ride a pony and see have ice cream and do all other kinds of fun things with her Uncle. They stopped at Cal Ranch to see the little bunnies and this is where Afton found her outfit ;)

Last one for now. I could upload hundreds :) It's a bit blurry. I decided that Autumn needed a baby doll of her own. Afton won't let her touch hers. So I found this one at ShopKo and the minute I handed it to Autumn she wouldn't let it go. She cried the few minutes it took to scan it and buy it.

That's all for now :) Thanks everyone for the support and prayers!

Breastfeeding stupidity RANT!

There are so many things I want to say to ignorant people and foolish mothers. But I try to refrain. So I will get it all out here. Where it will HOPEFULLY not offend anyone. And if it does, well, it's their fault for reading it. At least have some supporting evidence and basis to your counter arguments.

So today I am mad because someone said that its terrible to breastfeed in public. She said that "it's a special bonding moment and should be done at home". While I agree that breastfeeding is extremely bonding its more than that. It's how I feed my baby. How I provide my baby with the sustenance to survive. And I also do not spend all day every day sitting at home. Granted much of my time is at home as a SAHM but I do have a life outside of my house.

This person also went on to say that "you should feed your baby before you leave" and I'm thinking, "No kidding! But guess what? Babies need to eat every couple of hours!" And she says, "So pump or bring formula" and this just makes no sense to me whatsoever. For one thing, how is PUMPING in public any better than breastfeeding in public?!?! And Why would I give my child something like formula, which is equivalent to junk food for a meal when I have a healthy supply of breastmilk. Not to mention MY BABY DOESN'T TAKE BOTTLES!

Oh and so she says, "go somewhere designated for nursing, or sit in the bathroom" Ok first of, public restrooms. GROSS. I don't care how clean a public restroom is, I am NOT going to feed my baby while sitting on an uncovered toilet in a stall!

So go to a place designated for nursing. Well super but how often are those even available?!?! I was at the zoo yesterday. They have ONE area designated for nursing. ONE. At the FRONT entrance of the zoo. So if my baby is hungry while I'm at the opposite end of the zoo I'm supposed to trek all the way back to the front, towing my screaming toddler away from the polar bear, so that I can feed my baby just so someone else doesn't get offended by me FEEDING my child? They wouldn't have any protest to me giving her a bottle, or a jar of baby food. So what's the big difference? NEWS FLASH! That's what breasts are FOR!

Ok so I can understand someone (especially males) feeling uncomfortable with it, so out of politeness, I cover up.

But if a MOTHER says something to me about it that just blows my mind. I'm going to say it. IF YOU ARE WILLING TO BE A MOTHER THEN YOU MUST BE WILLING TO BREASTFEED!!! There is simply no excuse not to. Mothers, Can we PLEASE stop this RIDICULOUS excuse of "I just didn't have enough milk." Because its a load of crap!!! It's just an excuse to make you feel better about yourself for not even trying! Only 1% that's right ONE PERCENT of women actually cannot produce enough milk. ONE P-E-R-C-E-N-T!!!! So don't kid yourself that you are one of those.

I get that breastfeeding is difficult sometimes. BEEN THERE! It's hard! So what? You keep trying! You do whatever it takes to feed your baby! It's a LEARNED process. That doesn't mean the first time you try to feed your baby that BOOM! Success! You BOTH have to learn. So give yourselves both some credit and realize that you CAN and SHOULD breastfeed.

Another thing that just really PISSES me off is Formula. Commercials and even DOCTORS make it sound comparable to breastmilk. Well guess what. IT'S NOT! Formula is manufactured in bulk, using the cheapest OILS available to create it. It's jam packed with fillers and empty calories. Its the equivalent of an adult eating only fast food. And we all know what THAT looks like.

While I agree that formula DOES have it's place, for example, adopted babies, it should be a last resort. It should be available by appointment prescription only.

Another thing, people point out all the time that at one year old they get to switch to cow's milk yay they are so excited. Really? How in the world is another animal's milk, an animal who has 4 stomachs or so just to digest their food, better for your child than it's own species milk??? And what is this magical cut off time of a year? Oh my baby has been alive this many minutes, guess he/she doesn't human milk anymore! BAM! Magic. Let your kid decide when they are done. Of course Cow's milk probably is better than formula.

So if you care enough to be a mother then care enough to feed your baby the way you're supposed to. Otherwise, get sterilized.

Angels

This morning when Afton woke up she said, "I'm so mad!" And I asked her why she was mad and she said, "I miss my friends! They had to go." I'm sure that she had some little angels visiting her. She is quite insistent about it and asked me to call them because she misses them. The innocence of children opens up the doors of heaven and gives them peaks beyond the veil. I have no doubt of this.

Crawling

Autumn has been "army" crawling for a couple months now but just the last couple of days she has been getting up and crawling on her hands and knees a few times. Its so adorable. She is still very shaky and hasn't quite figured it out yet so she resorts back to the army crawl when she wants to get anywhere. Afton never really crawled. She rolled wherever she wanted to go. She crawled for about a week and then walked. I don't even remember her crawling. Autumn has also started pulling up on furniture and things to standing. She is growing up so fast! Afton gets quite irritated with Autumn as she gets into whatever Afton is doing. I've had to get stern with her several times for pushing Autumn away. She just doesn't know quite how to handle all this sharing and Autumn suddenly being mobile enough to reach more and follow. Afton will surprise me by doing something really sweet like coming over and touching my face and saying, "you're really such a sweetheart mommy". It melts my heart. Autumn's adorable grin never fails to make me smile :)

Remembering

When I was pregnant with Afton I kept a journal and wrote down how I was feeling and some of the thoughts I had. I really love it and love looking back through it and remembering that time. I meant to do one when I was pregnant with Autumn and just never got around to it. Which makes me sad. But I can't change it. So I thought that as I remember some things from when I was pregnant with her I would write them down :) I remember when I was about 12 weeks along I got a doppler to listen for her heartbeat. We didn't know she was a girl yet of course. I had just found her heartbeat, that beautiful "swish swish swish" sound and Tyler said, "Is that her?!" And I laughed and said, "Oh so it's a girl?" And he just laughed. I felt like she was a girl from the very beginning. There were several times I got out the doppler to listen to her heartbeat and to hear her moving around. One time I could distinctly hear that she had the hiccups and I just laughed and savored the wonderful sound. We had an ultrasound done of her at 16 weeks to find out her gender. She had the hiccups then too. So cute watching her little body bounce with them. I remember the ultrasound tech saying, "Look at her little brain." And I thought, "Did he say her?!?!" And then he showed us that she was definitely a girl. He said, "There is nothing there between the legs! She is definitely a girl!" And Afton was there and I told her, "Afton you are going to have a baby sister!" And she was very excited and cute about it :) Here she is at 16 weeks along. She was so darling already. Ultrasounds really are incredible.

Her sweet little hand

I'll have to write down more as I remember. I am definitely not slacking with my next someday! And at least I have her baby Calendar to write things in as she grows now :)

Fotofly

We recently got pictures done at Fotofly. It's my all time favorite photo studio! They are so incredible. We had Autumn's newborn pictures done there and we were so impressed with the entire process and the photographers. This experience was just as good if not better. They worked with us and our kids and got some amazing shots. I just love their technique and how they treat us. Here are some of my very favorites.


Afton was very good about holding Autumn


Afton spinning. I love her necklace flying :)


This is my favorite of Autumn. She is just so darn adorable!


This is probably my favorite of Afton!


I absolutely love the effect of this one and how it shows how tall she is. So so cute.


Isn't she such a doll!


Family shot :)


My precious girls <3


Last one for now. Me and the love of my life :)

I'll post some more later probably. There are soooooo many adorable ones!